Independence

I’ve been struggling for a while, feeling bad because the only, or at least the biggest, thing I really care about in life is to share it with someone.

It seems like it has became some kind of crime nowadays, in times when single is the norm, to loose yourself in someone else. I want to turn that over. When I held the love of my life in my arms, and felt loved by her, I instantly knew that she is the one for me. Unfortunately, I’m not the one for her. But that’s another story…

What I want to say is, I didn’t loose myself in her. I WON myself in her. The need and will of sharing my life with someone I love and feel loved by doesn’t make me too dependent. I survive on my own. I stay alive. I do what I need to do. And when I want to do something, I do that. I don’t need to share my life with someone. I am independent.

But. When I feel loved by one I love. When I hold someone who wants to hold me. No matter if we’re on different continents, it’s enough to know that it’s true. When I’m in this state, I fly. I’m invincible. Supernaturally strong. And suddenly I know exactly what I want. And when. Where. How. I don’t build my life around her. I build my life around myself. But this construction becomes solid, lasting and true only when there’s real love, shared with HER.

So, to all of my friends… Don’t be afraid of losing yourself in someone else. Look forward to WIN yourself with someone else. And don’t feel a shame for feeling like the meaning of life and your biggest wish is to share it with someone who loves you. Because it’s not a crime. It’s natural, it’s our biggest instinct. And it’s the most beautiful thing that can happen. Just make sure it’s mutual……..

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